please accept my resignation as associate
chemist at the gert institute. i plan to leave my job here on september 30,
19–, taking a few days of annual leave just prior to that effective
date.
as you know, my primary interest has been
in the oil and gas industry. therefore, i’ve accepted a position with
fury refining, inc., that should put me back in touch with my “first
love.”
although i’m eager to accept the
challenges in this new position, i regret leaving the institute. you and the
organization as a whole have treated me very well over the past three years. i
won’t forget the friendship and professional growth i’ve
experienced as an employee here.
best wishes to all of you for years of
expansion here.
sincerely
第二篇:外企员工英文辞职报告
dearxxx,
as a graduate of an institution of higher
education, i have a few very basic expectations. chief among these is that my
direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground
squirrel. after your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and me
during the commission of our duties, i can only surmise that you are one of the
few true genetic wastes of our time.
asking me, a network administrator, to
explain every little nuance of everything i do each time you happen to stroll
into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious
oxygen. i was hired because i know how to network computer systems, and you
were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who
watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of cut and paste for the
hundredth time.
you will never understand computers.
something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. you
will also never understand why people hate you, but i am going to try and
explain it to you, even though i am sure this will be just as effective as
telling you what an ip address is. your shiny new imac has more personality
than you ever will.
you walk around the building all day,
shiftlessly looking for fault in others. you have a sharp dressed, useless look
about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually
have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will
cover for your glaring ineptitude. in a world of managerial evolution, you are
the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. managers like you
are a sad proof of the dilbert principle.
since this situation is unlikely to change
without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, i am forced to tender my
resignation. however, i have a few parting thoughts.
1. when someone calls you in reference to
employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation. the most you
can say to hurt me is i prefer not to comment. i will have friends randomly
call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because i know you
would be unable to do it on your own.
2. i have all the passwords to every
account on the system, and i know every password you have used for the last
five years. if you decide to get cute, i am going to publish your favorites
list, which i conveniently saved when you made me back up your useless files. i
do believe that terms like lolita are not usually viewed favorably by the
administration.
3. when you borrowed the digital camera to
take pictures of your mothers birthday, you neglected to mention that you were
going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. then you forgot to erase
them like the techno-moron you really are. suffice it to say i have never seen
such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but i assure you that those have been copied
and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of
recommendation. (try to use a spell check please; i hate having to correct your
mistakes.)
thank you for your time, and i expect the
letter of recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. one word of this to
anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to
the public. never screw with your systems administrator. why? because they know
what you do with all that free time!
as a graduate of an institution of higher
education, i have a few very basic expectations. chief among these is that my
direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground
squirrel. after your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and me
during the commission of our duties, i can only
surmise that you are one of the few true
genetic wastes of our time.asking me, a network administrator, to explain every
little nuance of everything i do each time you happen to stroll into my office
is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. i was hired because
i know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to
provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt
to understand the concept of cut and paste for the hundredth time.
you will never understand computers.
something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. you
will also never understand why people hate you, but i am going to try and
explain it to you, even though i am sure this will be just as
effective as telling you what an ip address
is. your shiny new imac has more personality than you ever will.
you walk around the building all day,
shiftlessly looking for fault in others. you have a sharp dressed, useless look
about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually
have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent
will cover for your glaring ineptitude. in a world of managerial evolution, you
are the blue-green algae that everyone else
eats and laughs at. managers like you are a
sad proof of the dilbert principle.
since this situation is unlikely to change
without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, i am forced to tender my
resignation. however, i have a few parting thoughts.
1. when someone calls you in reference to
employment, it is
illegal for you to give me a bad
recommendation. the most you can say to hurt me is i prefer not to comment. i
will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you
honest, because i know you would be unable to do it on your own.
2. i have all the passwords to every
account on the system, and i know every password you have used for the last
five years. if you decide to get cute, i am going to publish your favorites
list, which i conveniently saved when you made me back up your useless files. i
do believe that terms like lolita are not usually viewed favorably by the
administration.
3. when you borrowed the digital camera to
take pictures of your mothers birthday, you neglected to mention that you were
going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. then you forgot to erase
them like the techno-moron you really are. suffice it to say i have never seen
such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but i assure you that those have been copied
and kept in safe places pending the
authoring of a glowing letter of
recommendation. (try to use a spell check please; i hate having to correct your
mistakes.)
thank you for your time, and i expect the
letter of
recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am
tomorrow. one word of this to anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant
obsessions will be
open to the public. never screw with your
systems administrator. why? because they know what you do with all that free
time!